Bittersweet

Today is sort of bittersweet.  My baby boy turned 2.  He is my last baby and he and I share a special bond that I can't explain.  I am a little sad that he is growing up and I won't have a little one anymore soon..  Yet as he gets older, it allows me a little more freedom in my life.  It's a little less chaotic as he now will play quietly by himself or with his siblings, watch a whole movie, and let me know when he wants a drink or a snack.  He has always been a pretty laid back little baby.  He came into this world with a bang.  I went in around 9:30 am and he was born at 11:45 am.  He was over 2 weeks late but when he was ready, boy was he ready.  It was by far my most enjoyable experience ever.  Maybe because it was so fast, maybe because I had the freedom of walking and eating and getting in a tub when I wanted.  I had no nurses telling me an epidural was ok, that it didn't mean anything if I got one.  And then once he was here, he laid a blanket of calmness over me.

I don't really remember having any nursing issues with him, he was a huge boy at 9 lbs. 4 oz.  He didn't cry a lot, he loved to cuddle, he slept fine in his crib from the first night.  Even as he got older he was easy going, go-with-the-flow type of kid.  Maybe because he was the last of 5?  The news he was on his way was shocking, scary and even sad at first, but today I cannot imagine life without him.  I can't imagine not having any of them actually, but with life a little turbulent at the time he was concieved, the odds were against it being a good thing.  I'm happy it turned out and even improved my life and relationships.

I guess after 5 kids I was due for one that was fairly easy.  Not to say that it will always be easy but for now I cannot complain.  So we started off the year with the first birthday of many.  I have high hopes for this year.  It has to be better than past ones and we are doing everything possible to make sure it is.  If we all make it out with our sanity intact then I will consider it a success.

So Happy Birthday to my little man, you make me laugh and smile every day and you lift me up when I'm feeling down.  I love you more than I can say, I'm glad you are my baby boy.